I lost my way and through misstep and fall and I find myself in a place I don’t recognise.
Lights dimmed down low so I can’t see what’s coming, the overwhelming fear of precious things now hidden.
I try to stand up, to rebalance but one side is too heavy, not my right side, but my wrong side.
That invisible border inside me, the line that shouldn’t be crossed, through inaction I caused this disorder, I didn’t mean to become so lost.
I feel my foundations crumble, I’m too weak to walk life in the dark, I know that I’ve stupidly stumbled but I do know I’m honest of heart.
Can’t begin to express how remorseful I am, I want to prove I’m a boy who’ll do right, I can’t stand around feeling sorry for myself, I feel like I’m losing a fight, in this fight I’m my own enemy, pointing and laughing at my own failures, waves of shame smashing into me and knocking me back to the ground.
But every time I’ll pick myself up and learn to let those wave pass through me, my feet fully anchored to what’s right.
Let this be a constant reminder, a bookmark for my brain, make the right choices before I decide, there are ways to avoid all this pain.
I’m tired of feeling the torrents of tears tumbling down my face, I’m choosing to climb up and ascend myself and rise to a higher place.
I can be right, not wrong.
I will do right, not wrong.
I’ll turn the lights back on.